FYI
Sibling abuse, including sibling sexual abuse, commonly known as sibling incest, is more prevalent than most people would like to believe. In fact, it is probably the most accepted, and ignored, form of domestic violence.
According to Dr. Vernon Wiehe, professor of social work at the University of Kentucky and author of Perilous Rivalry: When Siblings Become Abusive, '...as many as 53 out of every 100 children abuse a brother or sister, higher than the percentage of adults who abuse their children or their spouse. What some kids do to their brother or sister inside the family would be called assault outside the family'.
Because of the relationship of perpetrator and victim the abuse is rarely acknowledged or understood within the family. It is often hidden or minimized outside the family. 'Boys will be boys' or 'siblings fight' are often heard phrases which minimize the activity, and the damage caused by such behaviors.
Here you will find information about the problems associated with this type of domestic violence. "Sibling Sexual Abuse - A Parents Guide" offers much useful information. Separate sections help parents to recognize sibling abuse and give information on how to intervene if you discover this is happening in your family. Also of interest is a section on prevention of sibling sexual abuse.
Perpetrators are frequently protected by parents and other family members. This protection shields them from dealing with the consequences of their actions. The victim is also not given the help that they need in order to deal with the effects of the abuse.
Survivors of sibling abuse & sibling sexual abuse often display signs of post traumatic stress disorder. The symptoms are the result of traumatic events with which the survivor is unable to cope. Complex post traumatic stress disorder is a relatively new term, first used by Judith Herman in her book Trauma & Recovery, and is used to distinguish symptoms and situations of CPTSD from those of PTSD.
CPTSD is frequently seen in survivors of trauma, abuse and control extending over months or years.
There may also be signs of dissociative identity disorder or DID. Many of the symptoms of DID will also be found on the other lists of symptoms caused by severe trauma.
Some people with DID may have a tendency toward self-persecution, self-sabotage, and violence. The violence may be self-inflicted and/or directed at the outside.
Denial serves to reinforce the damage. The person will have problems that may last for a lifetime if they do not receive treatment.
This is a list of symptoms or warning signs that abuse is taking place or may have taken place. These are generally encountered in magnified proportions.
Failure to thrive
Weight loss/gain
Anxiety and/or depression
Listlessness
Phobias or irrational/inexplicable fears
Personal space/privacy issues
Difficulty with authority
Passivity
Low self esteem
Nightmares
Anger
Emotional outbursts
Frequent illness
Withdrawal
Sympathy issues
Difficulty sleeping / insomnia or fear of the dark
Some abused children & adult survivors may participate in:
Some abused children may become:
Addictive behavior
Self destructive behavior
Self injury
Suicide threats and/or attempts
Aberrant sexual behavior
Prostitution
Aggressive
Disruptive
Hyperactive
Impulsive
Negative
Adult survivors of abuse including sibling abuse may suffer from some of these symptoms. These symptoms may vary in degree according to type and duration of abuse. Recognizing symptoms is an important first step in recovery.
The perpetrator usually does not get the treatment that they need to stop this type of behavior. Parents and other relatives sometimes cover up the abuse out of disbelief or shame. The perpetrator continues the behavior unless they receive treatment.
Friday, April 28, 2006
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6 comments:
keep at it. you are not stalling at all, and we are there to hold your virtual hand.
Thank You both :)
I am waiting with anxious breaths to hear about the rest of your family. You hit so close to my home. This is a very needed dialouge. A very under reported arena at best. You go, you stall, you do what ever your heart tells you. Sexual abuse and power struggles are just that,...struggles to which too many persons can relate. It rips and tears those who have been where you elude to. Open this story and you could help many people. May I just tip toe into the kitchen for another glass of wine whilst I reflect upon my brothers and cousins.
You know you are not alone and I look forward to sharing more if you can. Please do!
Tamela Maye Belle
This is absolutely awesome. I am a survivor of sibling sexual abuse by two older brothers. This went on for years unreported but not because there was lack of opportunity for this to be disclosed.
I have become very familiar with all the literatue on the subject and you are right on the money.
Thank you!
I'm 50 years old and still can't get my past abuse out of my head. I told myself today is the day I would start to look into this and I found your site. I'm thinking about getting some advise. Thank you.
I am glad you found my site...I hope the article helped you as it did me. The article made me realize I am not alone and there is a reason for my anxiety and fears. I feel It helps just knowing you are not alone. My prayers will be with you as you seek your healing.
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